Monday, April 16, 2007

Dancing With The Stars - Week 5

It's the fourth week of Dancing With The Stars. Now that Tramp is gone, let's see if we can finally get rid of Clyde. Although booting Heather's butt would be a positive also!

First up is Ian Ziering doing the samba. Cheryl taught him how to shimmy. And he was one shimmying fool! He was pretty good. Not as good as past weeks. Scores: 8, 8, 8.

Next up is Clyde Drexler. Ugh. How is he still on this show?! I don't get it. It's just embarrasing. He makes Master P. look good. Get him outta there already! And sneak Heather under his coat on your way out. Scores: 4, 5, 4.

Now we got Woody Mills doing the samba. That leg will be all over the place. That bitch Heather made Jonathan shave his chest. Sorry, but during the whole dance all I could stare at was her leg. She did ok, but bitch shaved his chest, so she's stank! Bruno said she needs to work on her top section. Sorry Bruno, there's no way to fix that ugly mug of hers. Unless you got a paper bag behind that desk. Scores: 7, 7, 7.

Next is Joey Fatone. Big boy is pretty suave. Work it chubs! Len said his dancing seemed a little too feminine. And I like that right when he said "feminine" the camera switched to a shot of Lance Bass in the audience. HEH!

Poor Lance. Scores: 8, 8, 9.

Up next is John Ratzenberger. He was...well, like he usually is, but he sure seems to be having fun and a lot more entertaining than Clyde. The coot should stay a little longer. Scores: 6, 6, 6.

Now we got Laila Ali. She was smoldering! Work it girl! I was expecting them to get busy right there on the dance floor. Scores: 9, 10, 9.

Now it's Apolo Anton Ohno doing the samba. Wow, they were great and HOT! That was the best performance of the evening in my opinion! Scores: 10, 10, 10. Cool! I gotta do a video. It's below.

Apolo Anton Ohno - Samba
Uploaded by mickeymcc

Poor Billy Ray Cyrus is last to dance and after Apolo, how can he be anything but a letdown. And he pretty much was. Of course, better than Clyde for sure, but clumsy. Billy Ray says he would rather do this dance with all the lights off. Believe me Billy Ray, we wish all the lights were off too so we couldn't see it! Scores: 6, 6, 5.

Ok, it is clear that Clyde was by far the worst dancer tonight and needs to go home. Now America, stop feeling sorry for the nice basketball player. It's time to get rid of the dead weight! With all that said, my prediction for who will go home is Billy Ray.

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